The whatever-ness

My hands and my brains can't take it anymore. The ludicrousity that is offered in a beautiful platter every night on Sun TV has been ringing alarm bells in my head for an incredible amount of time now.

Let's get to the bug. We all easily have a laugh at the Tamil TV serials that are being dished out like candies but the day has come when I have to note what makes the world go round here.

Okay, here's a list of things that I have against serials (I can sue them if there's a chance of doing so).

1. Every other cinema actress who fails there take a 'leap of faith' into serials. And she ALWAYS plays the ever-so-goody, exemplary, she loves everybody, she helps everybody, picture perfect woman. Get a life.

2. Oh yeah, all serials are female centered. The leading character is always a woman. Never a man. Male characters are totally incapable of hooking people to the screen for a mind blasting 600 episodes in a row.

3. The lead female is almost always a stand-alone woman at some point- she will live without her husband. She has to do that because she needs to be the strong one, you see? All of them will go through a bit of rocks in their married life. In some cases, the husbands are just plain BAD, you know. Otherwise, it's just sinful isn't it?

4. They waste 5 minutes of each serial with a song. It runs 5 times a week, and that song plays every freaking time. They hire a team of dancers to dance to that, and by the time you get to the story, we are nearly 10 minutes in the time slot. Excellent time-wasting, producers. Be proud.

5. Oh, the easiest job in the world is to write a freaking STORY or even a script for a Tamil drama. It's easy- maybe let's say three scenes for every episode? Rest just leave to the dialogue writer, they know how to stretch even a non-event scene into a cruelly long one.

6. The music composer is the biggest criminal, he places the most thrilling, heart beat music for scenes that turn out to be pure duds. It's like a character comes and says, 'hey, you've got a dirt on your back'.

Jeng Jeng Jeng.

The other character (the one with the dirt) stares at person A with such shock and disbelief.

And don't forget they have to slow mo at some point. If at a scene which is being shot there are five characters around, the director generously ensures he captures the eye contact between all those characters- each one of them with each other.

By the time the fella realizes he's just got a freaking dirt on his freaking back, you passed a freaking say, 6 minutes? This people are just amazing.

7. Ridiculous dialogues happen in the most ridiculous places. There'll be a court trial and the characters will be pouring their emotions to the judge, or the policeman, or the lawyer. And these people will actually listen, it seems. For god's sake these officials will only ever collect details. Try standing up to one of them that you had some 'avamanam' two days ago. They'll finish writing a verdict by the time by the time you finish narrating an unrelated event. Goodness me.

8. Here's the masterstroke. They want to end the drama for that episode, but they don't know how. What they do, they cut through a lame scene, make one character say a statement of accusation (or it sounds like one), and they put 'to be continued'. Next day, it turns out the whole scene has little significance.

9. It's very educating religiously. They expose the most ridiculous rituals that many would have thought must be banned for their sheer stupidity in the modern world that we are living in now, but they will still show you scenes of a ritual to separate families, and how the families will actually adhere to that rule because it will become 'sami kuttam'.

Why don't they just show 'Amman' rising up and sticking blades in their eyes when they slightly breach any ritual rules? With a serious music this time.

I'll ban dramas from showing scenes that can mislead if I have the authority. But too bad people choose to be ignorant about it.

It's just as bad as a guy accidentally placing 'kungumam' on a girl's forehead and the next thing he knows he has to marry her no matter what. Grrr.

End of the day, I walk out after watching a drama and look for a wall. So that I can bang my head on it. The easy way to attain high blood pressure? Tamil dramas.

The warrior will be alright.

It’s dusk. The sun sets solemnly across the horizon- the warrior loves dusk. He has always felt that the spates of colors strewn across the sky at dusk leave behind a flicker that the eyes will never feast upon at any other time of the day. He sat at the nearby branch, a sole stricken one in the middle of an unknown desert, and he looked up towards the sun. The cloudy horizon have made the sun hardly visible to the naked eye. A faint light shimmering beyond the thin veil of clouds, that was all his eyes could muster to witness at the time.

The thin haze that has been coating the horizons around the place on a consistent basis had also deprived the warrior of his most cherished view- a peek towards the top of the mountain- bright and glistening. Every time he witnesses that peak, he feels like he does belong to that peak, to reach there one day has been etched in his destiny.

But now, there is no dusk, no mountain. All that exists was him, the desert, and the village, a village which he had long assumed would be an useful pit stop in order for him to reach his dreams. The warrior did not like it the moment he arrived in this village- where everyone worked very hard in premeditated routines in order to win the breads to survive the day. The warrior wasn’t an exception in this- he wasn’t given a prince treatment- he had to work to win his bread- for he has to wait until the clouds clear and the sun can rise up confidently and unleash its ray on earth without any barriers again.

Now, as the warrior lay against the sole broken branch in the middle of a dry desert on which the village is located, he feels exhausted, tired, dread. The everyday routine at the village had had its taxes on his energy and enthusiasm. His resources are drained by the end of the day, and he couldn’t have his daily glance beyond the horizons to look at the peak of the mountains that he wishes to conquer one day.

What is happening to his life? Where have his dreams brought him to? Why is the haze so thick he can’t see his destination? He abandoned a kingdom of comfort, security, all to secure the reality of this one dream- he travelled through ages of uncertainty about where his destination would lie, spent so many years of the journey travelling all alone- but as long as he was on the move, when he had his evenings by the crystal clear lake, or under an autumn tree drooping with gorgeous brown leaves, practicing the art of swinging and slinging his sword, as his horse fed on the natural leaves at every stop he pauses at, looking at her master in awe and loyalty.

Today, the sword rusts in the little camp, in which the warrior retires every night- and the warrior shoots the sword a glancing, solemn look, wondering when the time will come for him to ride off into the sunset again, the sword piercing elegantly across his back. His horse waits tied outside the camp, feeding on the same grass everyday, entitled to the same routine the warrior is being subjected to.

The warrior sits and contemplates, wishes he is on the move rather than remaining here- but this is the pit stop he needs to take in order to reach the peak of the mountain. He is made to be on the move, not to rut in a rust. He is made to conquer that peak, not to sit idle doing regular work.

But then he thinks of that sunny day where, when the warrior did not know which direction he should take to reach the mountains which seemed so distant away- when a saint appeared while the warrior was walking on a bed of tulips holding hands with his princess.

The saint pointed in this direction- on the first morning in which the princess held his hand- the direction of this small village; that the warrior should start a life there, and that’s where his journey would have its starting point. The warrior knew there and then, that it was a sign, for he was holding the princess’ hands when the saint looked down from the high hills and pointed his ageing stick in this village’s direction. Upon which the princess gave him a warm smile- so wide it made his insides tingle with joy and warmth.

The warrior walked deeper into his tent, wondering about the crossroads and uncertainty he is facing in his life. Every warrior has to trudge a path of mud in order to be worthy champions. This is his alley of mud. An alley where he can lose all that he is- where he has to hold on tight in order to retain his will, passion and dreams. That is his test.

The pain is true, the discomfort is true, the itchy feet is true, the difficulty is true. But the warrior has accepted it- come to terms with it. This is what will make him a worthy champion.

But as he lies down his head gently on the princess’ shoulders with her brimming smile still there, he knows for a fact- it’ll be alright.

The new rainbow

The warrior once sat down bespectacled, wondering if at all he will attain what he desired. What he wanted. He is still making that journey, but the perennial doubts keep visiting him, throwing him into a whirlwind of uncertainty. Is this a battle that he has to fight alone? Will it be a futile one? Is he making a journey in which the destination will never materialize?

Word of wisdom had drained his ears. Some wise man had once told him that when you want something so badly, the whole universe will conspire to make you achieve it. The warrior knew for sure that his destination is not even remotely close yet- the only way to continue is to keep going despite all the uncertainties riddled in his mind- that's when he had realized that what he was actually looking for is a shoulder to lean on, somebody who could accompany him in this bewildering, taxing journey. The warrior knew that he had had been looking for this person for a long time, hoping someday she would come in his line of sight, but now the thought of whether she ever existed was needling him.

And then the warrior realized he had someone to pick him up from his troubles all along. A companion who has always been there to help him through a hard times, a woman adorned with qualities that he has been looking for all along- but how did he not realize it? Now that woman rides with him through that journey, and the warrior does not fear falling or being defeated. For he knows she will be there to hold him up in good stead. The lack of soldiers had once been his greatest concern, but now he know he wasn't actually looking for soldiers, but instead looking for someone like her- he was looking for the most magical word of all- love.

And they say love can conquer mountains. The warrior still has to climb up the mountains himself, but facing demons doesn't seem like an ardous task anymore- if anything, love conquers fears and uncertainties.

The warrior once reached an edge of the mountain which looked like a dead end, he could not see a way put or a way further up from it. All he saw was a small path that was heading nowhere, he took it, and the only thing that rang in his mind was the same adage that he has so blindly followed for six years- when you want something so badly, the universe will conspire to make you achieve it. Next thing the warrior knew, he was climbing a difficult slope, but at the end of that slope, he realized that he had taken a step closer to the peak of the mountain he wants to conquer. He looked down back, and realized how impossible an task it was, and yet he did not heed to the difficulty at all. The wind of the mountain seem to be telling him that he has embarked on a new phase in his journey.

Few days later, the warrior had made a new group of friends, a pack of travelers as well to different destinations-- they were all at an altitude where they were exhausted and have not feasted for a long time. Word has it that somewhere around the mountain, a feast has been prepared for them. There's plenty of food still left around the place, little scraps of bread here and there, on which they have been feeding on for some time. But they felt it was time for some feast, but to find the feast there is a price to pay. They to abandon their breads behind as the luggage would prove to be too heavy, and with starvation already visiting them, they made the journey. The warrior once again remembered that old adage that the wise old man had told him once- and after a seeming futile journey that reduced all of them into a state of weakness, they were starring at a faint light inside a dark cave. As they sauntered inside, they were shocked to find that they were starring at the feast that they were looking for. They found plenty of offerings on the way, that of breads and mountain guards and old men discouraging them from their ridiculous urge to find the feast. For reasons they themselves could not explain, they were adamant on finding the feast, and at a time when the exhaustion had totally caught up with them, they found the place.

And when the warrior had his feast and walked back outside of the cave to a bright sunshine greeting, he realized the adage wasn't a blind one. When you want something so badly, you do eventually attain it. And he also realized something else- that the journey might be grueling, but it will never be futile- just when you thought your energy has been drained out, the desire will materialize, the dream will come true. The universe will conspire to give it to you when you least expected it- and when you do get it, you will realize that the tools to reach the destination has been lying around you all along- the journey is about attaining that wisdom to be able to look at things differently, and when you reach that stage, you shall be able to look around you and find the hidden treasures that were meant for you.

Today, the warrior has love- which he once though was an endless search. And with the universe seemingly ready to give him everything he pursues without an iota of fear, with only faith and hope in his heart- he looks up at the peak and smiles. He knows he will get there too. But there's no rush. He will enjoy the journey with love, faith and hope. He has abandoned fear at the foot of the mountains.

And he walked on.

Why we need to grow up?

Grow up. Grow up. Stop acting like a kid.

We probably have heard this statement repeated over in almost every household there is in this country- after a certain age, parents, or any elders that be, would nail the point hard through to the teenagers- the time has come for us to start acting adults. We need to talk mature, learn how to live (or survive), be cunning enough in our acts not to be taken advantage upon, learn how to earn money, not to be choosy, not to ask too many questions, and just live with a given situation.

You are walking flanked at either side by few of the most significant peoples of your life, on the midriff on a Sunday afternoon, the sun blazing nakedly over the horizon, unleashing its utmost ray- literally bathing you in sweat. You obviously don't like it, you have walked a far distance, and there's still that substantial amount of journey to go. Suddenly you see an elegant-looking car swoosh past you at the highways, covered in hue dark tinted windows, barely revealing the individuals inside. An element on mystery, an epitome of comfort. You envy at that drive, you wish immediately that you are in that car, and you tell yourself you will be in that car one day.

Few years later, you are in a very similar car, breezing past the terrains- watching from the cold, cozy comfort inside your car- and you witness a flock of people walking and talking with each other. You look at the vast spaces of your car and there you are, driving alone, and for the split moment, you'd think you make do without your shades, comfort, and elegance if you could take that walk again- flanked by people you love talking to, making them laugh and letting them make you laugh. You want, for once, for the journey to last longer so that you feel fulfilled when you reach home. What's the point of running to the destination? That one day in your life in which you will look back and say you wish- it will come.

Only that there is no reprieve when you are driving. You tell to someone the stories of your past, but indulging in past won't yield you a bread for the future, you have been told. On that ashen-faced day when you are actually sweating and walking, you take a cold drink with the people around you and bask at the great relief it provides. You don't feel like you need to be in that car anymore, all there is is a flicker of light in your eyes, gazing the future, imagining the day when you will have that elegant car in your possession, but with these people still around you, to enjoy it alongside you.

When you do drive, you realize you don't have time for that people anymore. They don't have time for you. All of you, as simple as it gets, have grown up. You have attained your pursuit, but why you wanted that pursuit in the first place has been long blown away with the wind- now brushing off the eyes and the minds of another young person, standing aloft with the world at his disposal- or so he thinks.

And then you think- that's life. And you say it with a sigh.

But why do we grow up? Why that maniacal need to grow up? It was once said that kids are God's favorite children. Ever wondered why? Is it just because they are small, innocent, unknowing? The answer is no. A child asks questions aplenty. Why is that tree green?- a child might ask. Why is the sky blue? Why don't rainbows last forever? Can we go nearer to those stars? What's beyond those skies? Why is this man begging to earn money? Can't we help him? How many countries are there in this world? Can we go around the world one day? Can we go to the sea?

What happens to all these questions? Do you get answers for them as you grow up? Obviously you don't. You just cease to ask those questions anymore- because you are told, those questions are not part of life as they say it is. Are they not? Have you figured out what life is all about? For sitting in your balcony one day and gazing into an empty space, sighing, and saying 'that's life' within the frames of your mind doesn't seem an exactly glittering way to look back at the form of life.

How do we smile when we look back? Only if we had had the courage to pursue what our hearts wanted. It's like a loose string when you let your heart rule you in life- instead of the more disciplined, rigid spaces of your brain with spoon-fed ideas, the heart's desires take you places, makes you take risks, makes you fall into deep wells, yet clamber back up to redeem yourself. The heart makes this life an incessant journey as long as there is breath in that body of yours.

And to pursue the heart's desires in the purest of senses, one must first have the ability to look at this world the way the eyes of a kid would look at it. Why shy away from questions? Do we, as the ever self-conscious adults that we are cultivated into, know all the answers that be regarding what life is all about, or even the world? We do not know anything, no matter if we are adults or kids. Why then, shouldn't we ask questions? Only then can we open new avenues for ourselves, can we conquer uncharted territories. Why look at life through the confinements of what the society thinks life is made up of? Look at the world and life, and start asking questions. You will realize there are much more answers to be found out there-- enough answers to last a lifetime. Stop sitting around, and start to make that journey that improve you as a person with every little baby steps you take. You won't end your life knowing everything even when you do that, but when you reach that twilight zone, you will know that you treated life as a journey that its supposed to be, and that you have traveled as far as you could.

The world is always at our disposal- waiting to be discovered, new wonders waiting to be unearthed. Only if you make that journey will you understand what's beyond those stars, and what's beyond those horizons. Some of us think we can't find answers by traveling at the very surface of this earth, but lest do we realize, the answers for everything in life lies right around you.

Can you be a kid again, attain that innocence and purity again, and ask those questions again, with an urge to discover?

All that She is.

She loves coffee.

She's hyperactive at late nights.

She hates chocolates.

A sucker for shoes.

A Gossip Girl freak.

She dies for Harry Potter and anything to do with it.

She reads Enid Blyton to pass a short leisure time.

She can 'ter'-sleep whenever she's on the bed.

Her nails are always polished with various colors.

She's obsessed with Anushka Sharma.

Milo is her diet drink, and also the only remote form of chocolate she consumes.

She tortures her roommates by singing to them.

She's a no.1 person.

If allowed, she'd stare at me the whole day.

Gulab Jamun- another one of her obsessions.

Penang is the best place in the world for her.

Hanuman is like her imaginary friend, at all times.

She says I make her heart smile.

Little things makes her happy.

She has the best smile in the whole freakin world.

She can go on and on and on, and I can listen and listen and listen, and never ask her to stop.

She can be utterly childish and amazingly adult at the same time.

She can write, but she doesn't.

She dislikes labs for one main reason- she has to cut her nails.

She loves to cross her legs.

She hardly drags her feet.

She has fears- fears that makes me take her in my arms.

She has strength- strength that makes me lean on her shoulders.

If nobody ever says a word against it, her whole room will end up flooded in pink.

Green are Red is what you will see associated with her when Pink is absent.

If you see a salon, then watch for her gaze.

Food is the main reason why she loves this country.

UK is where the fairytale future lies for her.

She'd sleep on a bed of tulips.

If there is a personality test, the teacher will suspect her of having copied me blatantly, even though we didn't sit beside each other.

She loves being hugged from behind.

She's a Vijay fan...duh

AND

She is what Love is all about.

Sai Thaman- young and vibrant

Let's admit it. Tamil cinema has had a fervent obsession in finding the next AR Rahman, at least for the last half decade. As if ARR's days in the industry are ever numbered, every flower that sprouted in the music arena in Kollywood has been tagged as the next big thing, and then settled into certain commonplace spheres. The best examples would be the sound rise of Yuvan Shankar Raja before he settled in becoming a composer on his own right, and also of ARR's own nephew GV Prakash, who has shown glimpses of brilliance so far. I am not excluded from the list of criminals who took some albums of young composers wanting to hear a next Rahman, only to half-meet expectations, the other measured by how far that composer has fared from Rahman's standards.

Thankfully, that trend has laid to a rest now (the Oscar and the Grammy probably made many realize gems like Rahman comes once in a lifetime and you don't simply find replacements in the nick of a finger). Before anyone reading this assumes it, I'm not on this to blabber about a next Rahman, but simply a composer who is showing much promise, and in my views, deserves greater opportunities to deliver on the large frame.

Ever remember the sexually mischievous plump boy who probably became the reason why many household parents (including mine) deem that Boys isn't a film appropriate for watching? Yes, that very boy is whom I am talking about- Sai Thaman. A product of the Shankar camp, he quickly faded after Boys, and has come back in a different avatar- that of a music composer.

He debuted last in year in Shankar's own home production- the subtle thriller 'Eeram' which featured much fresh, non-celebrity faces in the lead roles. Thaman's work was received with such accolades that grapevines had it that Kamal Hassan considered him to compose for his 'Yaavarum Kelir' (now re-titled as Karunyam)-- and I was probably the most dissapointed soul around when the Karunyam team, in an act that resembled false promise- went for typical instant churner Devi Sri Prasad instead. Not that DSP is a bad choice, but stars with big attractions ala Kamal are the ones who can really expose a slew of young musical talents in the offing for Kollywood. I'm not talking about Devi Sri Prasad or Srikanth Deva, or anyone in that melee, who attained fame with the fast-paced compositions. What about the composers who come in with striking quality compositions- melodious, heartfelt, yet your heart ache when you know they are not getting the attention they deserve for the supreme quality of their work. Given their age, people like Thaman show great promise, and even if they are not born gems- given the right opportunity, they can be honed into gems.

In a thriller like 'Eeram' where there was very minimal usage of music or songs for that matter, Thaman's 'Mazhaye Mazhaye' stood out as a musical statement for the entire film. The striking matter of this song is not only that its pleasing to the ear- but it really does bring the resemblance of rain/water when you listen to it. You can come almost feel the mist descending upon you, that's the aura and atmosphere that the song created, so fitting with the tone and the theme of the entire film. (He did do exceptional background score for the film as well).

And now you have 'Mudhinam Paartheney'. Of course, you might not even have heard of this film, but kudos to Thaman for staying off the music frame long enough, and comitting to a project like MDP. The film, made by a newcomer director with newcomers on the cover, has been receiving rave reviews since its release, and probably demonstrates Thaman's ability to choose films that can express his musical vistas. Again, the pity of the moment is that you probably have not heard MDP's songs- as they are not even aired on the radio channels frequently enough to attain the kind of exposure that it deserves. Instead, 'dappankuttu' or hardcore songs from low-budget, nonsensical, brainless movies get aired in order to beef popularity for that hopeless reel of 2 hours made without an ounce of creativity.

'Indre Indre' probably is the best melody of the year, second only to ARR's magical 'Hosanna' from VTV. The song is so soothing it left me cursing when I knew the length is just short of four minutes- too short for a song that leaves you asking for more. In fact, every song in MDP leaves a distinct variety about it- even though all of them are love songs, but Thaman brings out a different atmosphere with each of them- and all of them seemingly made to fit the narration- not one of them sound like they need to be taken out to Switzerland and be shot with lavish picturization. It's an art by itself to be able to convey the story and the theme of the film through its songs yet ensuring the songs remain catchy and pleasing to the ears. Every song in MDP conveys the urban romantic drama laced with realism that it is- and I could feel this even without watching a single motion of the film's promos to date.

'Manadhin Adiyil' is a combination of an urban journeyman song laced with classical fusion, another mark of Thaman's clear eye for creativity. The theme song reveals to us that Thaman sounds just like ARR. Does that tell us something? No, it doesn't. For once, let ARR be ARR, and Sai Thaman be Sai Thaman.

But it's time Kollywood grabs a blossoming young composer, and adorns him with opportunities of the highest to showcase his talents- not by composing mass-masala numbers for money-spinning heroes- but composing for fresh, off-the-trend films which still features big stars and big banners. Doing the former would only rust the apparent creativity Thaman has in himself. He'd do good to stamp his own forte before moving to mass-masala films where he would be allowed to experiment as he wishes to and bring different sounds without having to be rigid.

For once, I'm not hyping Sai Thaman's ability up. He has a long way to go. But he has made a textbook start to his career, and he needs to get noticed now. Let's hope that happens. Kollywood isn't hyping him up, which relieves great burden off his shoulders for once.

For a prospective career ahead.

Eternal Ray of the Blossoming Minds

Love? Yes, that is important, but the warrior went about his ride, telling himself along the way that finding a princess who would understand his burning desires and passion to conquer uncharted mountains and beyond would be an arduous task. If he had set in a sole journey to find her, it would distract him from the quest of conquering mountains.

So he went about, perceiving that love will just not come anytime soon. But life throws you surprises, in a way that you could never expect. By chance, traveling through the zillions of cybernetic data s that get sent and received everyday, the warrior found a woman, a traveler on her own right- an amazing blend of boldness and talkativeness. He had met her before, long before his journey as a warrior started, when he was still a young prince with eons of dreams waiting to be set loose from a world of rigid education, he saw her- a little girl with a tail that crossed continents. From far he watched, smiled to himself, and continued the journey. And now he marveled, and soon realized that she was a good companion to travel with. A cordial meet turned into a burgeoning friendship. The tail has shrank, the woman blossomed, yet she retained a fierce uniqueness that had always set her apart from the many women he had witnessed in his life. He adored the qualities, and enjoyed her company.

The journey continued. Despite having the woman close by, the warrior's heart yearned for a different woman he had met not so long ago. He did not pursue, instead, allowed the journey to unfold in its own pace, but struggled as the desires of his heart held him back from reaching his dreams. He couldn't travel. The woman he had wanted was making him unable to travel. His sword rusted, his horse laid rest, the warrior seemed lost in a world where the way forward wasn't visible, where his current desire had swallowed him and destroyed the dreamer within. The unique woman had moved on- she found a suitor for herself. She was lost in her own world soon enough. She was back in her own fierce world, as the warrior drifted into a world of uncertainty.

But she did not go away. She came back occasionally, gave the warrior a helping hand, told him that he has to move on to reach his dreams. The warrior was still uncertain, but later on, circumstances allowed him to finally mount his horse once again. His sword took its own sweet time to lose its rust and shine glaringly once again. The unique woman had helped him out.

The warrior did not forget the unique woman since then. He was grateful, thankful. And later, the unique woman realized her suitor wasn't the right one. They were both back in parallel paths, and traveled together, giving each other company, not knowing what the future destination might be. The warrior did not think much. He felt great to have a companion, and used the presence of that companion to great effect. They grew closer.The unique woman had gotten cautious. She sensed the possibilities, so did the warrior. They were reaching a point in the journey where they can't just be companions anymore, instead they need to proclaim to hold each other's hands and prolong that journey together.

The unique woman took a break, she drifted away from that journey. She rested her horse, sat idle, and the warrior, bespectacled, looked upon wondering and pondering what drove her to drift away. The woman said she will be back soon. She will join him again. But the warrior had lost the passion that he had had for her company. When she did rejoin him, the distance was apparent. The warrior couldn't return to normalcy. But he did not want to journey without her, and so the distance shrank once again. Months later, the warrior and the unique woman reached the same point of no return again. This time, the warrior ceased to hesitate. He had to make the decision. He disembarked his horse, and asked for the unique woman's hand to travel with him for the rest of his journey; finding her destination along the way.

She hesitated- her fears and uncertainties clouded her, but warrior knew what his heart, and also her heart- had wanted. Rest were just waves of details, and the warrior knew that in order to reach the destination together, both of them needed to exorcise their demons. He was ready for that inner battle, and conveyed to her that he was.

And she finally dismounted and took his hand, as dawn was setting upon that one opaque day. Yet beyond that cloud, the warrior knew what the setting sun had wanted him to do, and as the last spray of light vanished from the sky, the unique woman became the first woman of his life.

The journey of the warrior and the unique woman together was already a long one. Having already overcome the bricks of difficulties and distractions, they still traveled together for more than a year, and now are set to do it for the rest of their lives, without the fear of getting too close to each other. When the desires of the heart can be conveyed to someone, the journey of life becomes all the more easier. For you know there's someone ready to hold your hand even when he or she is not near you.

When the absence of someone, can still be perceived as their very presence through your thoughts and actions at certain moments, you know magic has happened.

You know that is the love you'd been waiting for all along.

And the warrior has now made the unique woman his princess, and now is embarking on a journey where he would be able to make her the queen of the kingdom.

For my princess- Rathi Maithily :)

May you become my queen when we conquer the mountains and last forever with me.

A Kamal Life

A few days ago, as I was watching Kamal Hassan’s 50 years in cinema commemoration event; Mamootty was giving a simple and straightforward speech about the man himself- stating that if so many people can praise and humble themselves in front of him, the sole reason that he is an actor, an artist of great caliber doesn’t justify all the praise Kamal gets, but instead, Kamal must have been a ‘great human being also’ in order to justify all that people shower on him.

I have read in various spaces how people constantly have waxed lyrical about Kamal’ s achievements and his credo that has taken him to great heights, and how his attempts influences and induces courage in some, and admiration in others. But how many of us had really given any kind of credit to Kamal Hassan for the man that he is, the person that he is?

It takes a very brave man, especially in an easily vindictive society like ours; it does take a very brave man to carve out his life entirely based on his ideologies. And that man was Kamal Hassan. One a many wouldn’t prefer to go to those areas which they consider ‘grey’ about him and discuss about it at any length, but I am more than happy to do so- and praise him with it as well. And the reason I had already stated above- it takes a very bold person to base his life upon his ideologies.

Kamal’s biggest point of controversy, as has been pointed out all these years- is that he was an atheist. First of all, let us acknowledge that fact that none of us, lest you or me, are aware of the entire truth as to what life breaks down to and what it is all about. All of us are travelers searching for that same faraway answer, and those hints we get, we keep them in our knapsack. Some of us have more hints (knowledge) than the others, but none, I can heartily and boldly state, knows the whole truth of it. Some find their calling and their purpose within the realms of religion, and Kamal finds his (as per his own words) in the society itself. There is nothing wrong in embracing those than you can see and attain a spiritual viewpoint based on that point itself. For the record, I’m not an atheist. But I will give all the credit in the world to Kamal for his ideas and his stronghold of them. I always say it takes a very strong person to be completely spiritual in a religious realm and also to be an ideological atheist. The former is because it takes a great man to be humble, non-assertive and completely submit himself to the powers that be above him. My friend once remarked to me that religion is a foundation and which we can fall upon, usually in times when life seems to be out of our control. All of us face hardships in life, but it does take a great man to discard that foundation so early in his life. What would that man fall back on? To entirely keep faith all by himself- that quality is as admirable as any.

His ideologies are universally adaptable- you can tell them to a Christian, a Muslim, A Hindu, and a Buddhist and it would ring true every time- Love is God. I have seen plenty of people who know perfectly well how to love God, but are the worst when it comes to loving those around them. Love each other- that credo is the same in every single religion in this world, and Kamal lives beyond the confinement that keeps us separated from each other with sensitive barriers. If everyone takes that credo and believes Love is God, will there be any terrorists left in the world? Will there be Any soul that would wield a knife and stab someone without being wretched by guilt for what he has done?

Some like to point to his family life as an indication of his imperfection- but which of us are perfect? The path Kamal has threaded was a path that he wants depending only on his passion and his ideologies. It wasn’t a familiar path- in fact I might say, he alone took up that road and travelled in it. He is bound to have made mistakes along the way- and lest I assert that he has paid the price and faced the consequences of his own mistakes. I have visited layman houses in India and find they do not think highly of that man just because he was married twice and at one stage of his life;was having children out of wedlock. But still for the young generation that would like to travel that same path, his journey is marked before us, so that we know what mistakes we could avoid to reach his heights. Normally we point at a loser and say- ‘Look, don’t do what he did, and you’ll be fine’. And yet today, we stare with such glaring amazement at the pinnacle of a mountain- despite stumbling, and being discredited along the way, he still conquered that mountain, and he has left for us the indication on what mistakes we could avoid, so that our journey is a much smoother one.

There is a saying in English- Success is measured by how much others measure their success using you as a yardstick. Kamal Hassan has given a very expensive value to success indeed, and me, and many other who adore him, use him as a yardstick to measure ourselves.

A great person is someone who manages to inspire and teach one of his students; but what do you call Kamal when he inspired me and many other (among my friends), whom he had never seen or heard about in his life? The mark of his legacy lives on us, for we acknowledge that flawed human that he was, and the great pains he took to improve himself and come out of that rut and proceed to his destination. And we know that even if Kamal has already conquered that mountain; he is already setting off to conquer another, and we shall continue behind him. Whichever path we may take when our calling comes, we do not know, but lest assured a piece of him will live on in those paths.

What have I expressed here is my personal testimonial of Kamal Hassan. Some may have assumed that I am a wannabe actor, but lest you are wrong. I am only a wannabe director, and a novelist, but nevertheless in terms dedication to the profession you are involved in, and as the complete artist that he is, he is still my idol. As Vivek so rightly asks in his poem of Kamal- ‘Is there any department that you do not know?’

I apologize beforehand if I had offended anyone with my views, but nevertheless I felt the necessity to express my views. And I take my leave with another one of Kamal’s credo- ‘No pain, no gain’.

That, in as simplest as four words could do, sums up Kamal Hassan- the person, the legend, the actor and everything else.

Vinnai Thaandi Varuvaaya- Music Review

Here we go. A start to the new year with an album by AR Rahman, that too for a film that has romance written all over it. It has been almost two full years since ARR last composed for a Tamil movie (we can take the abysmal Sakarakatti out of the equation), and this would the first album in Tamil for Rahman since his Oscar triumph last summer. The music has created such expectations that a drafted version of ‘Hosana’ which leaked out on the net itself became such a big hit among enthusiastic downloaders. Vinnai…will witness ARR’s first collaboration with established director Gautham Menon, who is coming on the back of a ‘divorce’ with Harris Jeyaraj, but also riding high on the success of Vaaranam Aayiram. However, Gautham fans expecting a Minnale-like album with instant chartbusters are in for a shock, and so do typical music listeners expecting catchy numbers. This album might remind one of Kangalal Kaidhu Sei, an album that took a long time for the listeners to wind up to and appreciate its quality. Similarly, ARR has threaded and daringly experimented with new feels for his songs once again with this album. The whole album creates a very different environment. It’s not just about one or two songs taking you someplace else, but in this case, almost the whole album does. It’s soothing, unspectacular, and needs to be appreciated by an ear for great music.

Omana Penne

Benny Dayal, Kalyani Menon

Sets the tone for the whole album. A simple, soothing love number laced with Malayalam lyrics in the middle. ARR clearly experiments in the middle stanzas, and mixes beats with carnatic and classical beats. Benny Dayal is a favorite of Rahman for such songs, and he delivers the goods with panache, especiall in the middle stanzas. Reminds me alot of Behka from Ghajini, another unique Rahman number sung by Karthik, but only difference is that Omanna Penne is even better than Behka. Benny is in top form, and ARR assures that the music and the tempo remains at a soothing level thoughout with minimal beats.

Anbil Avan

Devan Ekambaram,Chinmayi

Reminds one about Azhagiya Tamizh Magan songs. No, this not folk village beat, but a fusion that is hard to classify. Lyrics suggest this is a wedding song, and just like how you can’t classify Yaaro Yarodi from Alaipauthey or Kummi Adi from Jillendru Oru Kadhal, this song threads on the same path. Unconventional beats all over, but the end result is nevertheless catchy. Might take some time to grow, but won’t take long for you to appreciate this number. The choice of singers is expectionally good. Devan and Chinmayi both excel. Very Good.

Vinnaithaandi Varuvaaya

Karthik

Listen and close your eyes. Appreciate. Lyrics are almost non-existent, but Karthik is in wonderful form. The minimal instrument usage is the mark of a maestro. A pure blues number by ARR. Creates a great environment all through. Don’t expect this to be catchy, but this is pure upliftment. Music is simply brilliant. One would only wish there is a instrumental number using this tune. Brilliant. Pure ARR. His own league.

Hosana

Vijay Prakash, Suzzane, Blaaze

If you are already in love with the drafted Hosana, then you will fall head over heels with this. A striking improvement when Rahman tones down the song to fit the tempo with the rest of the album, additional orchestra and strings work wonders for it further. Vijay Prakash steals this song from the offing, and Suzzane and Blaaze both do admirable jobs. Will be in the charts for an awfully long time to come. Pick of the album.

Kannukul Kannai

Naresh Iyer

A fusion again. It looks like it will be hard to categorize ever song in this album, Kanukkul Kannai borders the closest to western sounds in the whole album. Music is catchy. Naresh Iyer is such an unique choice to sing a song like this. But ARR is no newcomer to experimentation isn’t he? And Naresh justifies the selection as well. A favorite of Rahman’s, he sings with panache and adds an extra appeal to the fairly appealing song.

Manipaaya

Shreya Ghosal, AR Rahman

Look at the two singers’ name. Arguably the sweetest young female voice nowadays, and one of the most soothing male voices in a single song. A class composition. Creates a great environment. Lyrics by Thamarai are great as well, the melody astounding. Credit should go to ARR for not overdoing the tempo and maintaining it to complement with the entire album. Soothing-ness at its best. Shreya is simply wonderful, her sweet voice giving goosebumps all over. ARR provides adequate support as usual.

Aaromalae

Alphonse

A full Malayalam number filled with guitar strings. And guess what, its brilliant. Great work by ARR on the instrumentation and the environment again. Every single sound is paid attention to, just an epitome of how a good a composer he is. Alphonse’s voice fits the bill perfectly. Brilliant.

All in all, you can’t ask for a better gift from AR Rahman to start 2010, that is if you are genuine ARR fan, you ‘d appreciate everything about this album that makes it work to the T.I do not know much about the masses, but I loved it. Hosana will definitely ruled the charts though.

****1/2. (Two Thumbs Up)

The birth of a white flower.

Some 18 years ago, singer Unni Menon was given a call way past midnight, awoken in his slumber, and was told that accomplished director Mani Ratnam is recording songs for his new film and Menon’s voice was required for one of those numbers. Who works at this hour, Menon asked himself. But due to the fact that the name involved was called Mani Ratnam, Menon freshened himself up and rushed up to the mentioned recording studio, where he saw a young composer calling the shots.

Mani Ratnam, who so often works with the Maestro Illaiyaraja, has discovered a new talent to associate with in the music department. Menon wondered continuously if this young guy- whose name is AR Rahman, could really live up to the humongous expectations of having to compose for a Mani Ratnam film. He was given the song lyrics, the tunes were discussed, and on the wee hours of that one day back in 1992, Menon recorded a song called ‘Pudhu Vellai Mazhai’ (A new white rain), and went back home, back to his slumber. The doubts that he had before recording the song existed even after that- he didn’t think that he had sung the most catchy of tunes, that thought lingered in his mind. Little did he know, that when he went to sleep that day, that just like lyrics of the song proclaims, he has witnessed a new white rain, that will reign the Indian music arena over the following two decades. All the uncertainties over the song that he had sung vanished into thin air as he listened to the final version of the song one day- and as he listened, he realized that this song is not catchy, but instead it makes the hair on the back of one’s neck stand up and applaud.

That AR Rahman back then was 26 years old. Today, as he turns 44, that white rain has poured down not only in Tamil Nadu, but up until on Hollywood’s most famous stage- the Oscar stage. Rahman was the very first composer in Indian cinema history to win a National Award for his very first film, an award that he would go on to claim two more times. A honorary doctorate and a Padmashri, India’s fourth highest civilian honor, are just a little peek into a mass collection of awards and applauds that this modest, humble, soft-spoken name with an ever present smile on his face has achieved in his career. That innocent smile never waned even as he stood next and around the best luminaries of Hollywood while collecting his piece of the biggest cinema cherry in the world, nor did it wane as he stood flanked by beautiful girls in Akon’s Beautiful Girls music video.

What is so special about his music, some may ask. Who introduced Hariharan and Shankar Mahadevan, two of the most famous, most accomplished male singers in the industry today? Who made Hariharan sing ‘Thamizha Thamizha’ with such sensitivity? Who is it that managed to evoke the atmosphere of an unborn child who is going to born into a world of chaos and uncertainty through Vellai Pookal? Who is it that managed to re-create a 50s and 60s atmosphere without sounding like direct throwback in Iruvar? Who is it that re-composed India’s national anthem with such passion and ferocity? Who is it that made the whole nation re-kindle a long-buried Vanthe Mataram? AR Rahman is not only a good composer, he is a symbol- a symbol of a nation struggling unleash itself from the strangling, rusting ropes of past differences and attempting to move forward as one, as one whole country. He is a symbol of passion, of the ultimate craftsmanship an artist could ever express with his own work. Above all, he is the perfect symbol of an artist, a celebrity. A man who has the talent to put the world at his awe, but has the humility not take all the credit for his achievements. A man who has the calmness to rise above petty differences and embrace goodwill as his nature, and has that smile that shows, without having to tell, that he loves what he is doing, that we love what he is doing, and God loves what he is doing.

Ever lost hope? Ever lost faith in goodness? Ever lost faith in the beauty of life? Ever lost faith in the impact of talent and artistry? Look up to AR Rahman.

Today as this man turns forty-four, there is no gift that we could possibly give him that would override 18 years of him showering us with gifts of music. But what we could do is to forget that he is forty-four, and make him immortal along with his music.

Many more happy returns of the day.

For,

AR Rahman- You are the rare white flower (Vellai Pookal) that tomorrow needs. May there be more white flowers like you to come in this world.

P.S. The first paragraph description was an excerpt of an interview given by Unni Menon.

The Cybergypsies- Bear, (((rrrree)))(llie**&^ Good

Best book I have read in my life? Maybe. That was what I was telling myself some 2 weeks ago. Now, yes. It is the best. Indra Sinha's Cybergypsies is a stunning tour de force, entertainment in the form of book reading at the highest quality.

What doesn't the book have? Imagination? Yes. Suspense? Yes. Reality? Yes. Humor? A big fat yes. Sattire? Thoroughly. Emotion? Greatly. Intellect? Yes. Enlightenment? Yes again.

Everything one should and would ask from a book is in this 392 page of absolute great craftmanship.

Cybergypsy is the account of Bear (Sinha himself), a copywriter at an advertising firm who details his travels on the electronic frontier and also in his 'real' life, often hovering on a guilt of losing his real life as he gets addicted to the Vortex of imaginations, and trying to recuperate and win back the Eve- the woman of his life, the woman he married.

In between this two ends, Bear travels to deep aeons of humanity, through his work with Amnesty he is exposed to the biggest conflicts that took place in the world at the time of writing- i.e. Saddam Hussein's crude mass murder on thousands of Kurds in Kurdistan, The Chinese prison guards' electric raging brutality on Tibetan freedom pledges, and also a corporate company's crude blindfold after a gas explosion in its factory wiped out almost an entire skirt of Bhopal in 1984. Harsh realities yes, but Indra mixes these harsh realities with a pint of imagination, narrating the story to us a-la a Shades or a Vortex game. The book is a celebration of the reality in which we live in, telling that of a man who transfixed himself to a fictional world and by the end of the world, realized that the gargantuan reality, no matter how harsh or unnerving, is where he wants to be. How subtly he narrates he wants to be Eve more than a Luna he never knew, and how he sees a soil homing so many little insect lives to be more of a miracle rather than Cyri, the beautiful horse in the Vortex.

Above all, the book subtly reads to us that instead of choosing 'not to know' realities which are harsh and live in our own imagination, we could stand up and make a difference, and be counted for if we had the guts to be honest to ourselves and accept the truths around us.

Sinha is a phenomenal writer, one who relates deep humanity with his narration, a touch of subsequently stunning humor, and also is, on a personal level, an amazing person because he has in fact travelled to such contrasting ends in his travels. From writing an ad for a nuclear plant, writing a Kama Sutra book and narrating a voice over for a video adaptation of the book, talking to pornographers, trying to hack and sabotage into the computer of a person believed to be nude-picturing underage girls, sitting beside a man who writes an indefatigable, utterly logic defying letter to Saddam Hussein pledging him to flee Kuwait,receiving a letter containing torture items that were personal belongings of the Dalai Lama, and narrating ad voice over with actor John Hurt. He has done it all. And he tells it all to us in this brilliant book.

We get a glimpse of how the pre-internet generation were already addicted to the online bug, how viruses were already a fashionable trend back then, and above all we see how much the Internet becomes a vortex that sucks people in and caters as a permanent hom for many people, leaving them both destructed and delusional, and at the same time, how it acts as a channel of reality, an expression of free speech, a flow for information that were blocked by governments and also companies.

Read this book if you could. In one word, this is 'Important'.